The Bonding Project

Researching How We Bond

The Bonding Project is a research-driven exploration of how people form, sustain, and imagine intimate connection. These profiles are designed to help you better understand your relationship wants and needs—not as fixed traits or prescriptions, but as living patterns that evolve over time, context, and experience.

At the heart of the project is a belief that there is no single “right”way to bond. Instead, people vary along multiple relational dimensions: how many connections they desire, how open or structured they prefer those connections to be, how they prioritize relationships, and how they balance interdependence with self-sufficiency. The Bonding Project offers a shared language for naming these differences, making them easier to recognize, discuss, and negotiate with connections.

Our Methods

We created the tests using research on relationship satisfaction, and then built these profiles from a combination of quantitative and qualitative data gathered directly from our bonders—the thousands of people who have taken our assessments, shared their lived experiences, and reflected on their relationships.

• Quantitative data helps us identify recurring patterns across large groups: common configurations, statistical clusters, and consistent axis placements.

• Qualitative data—open-ended responses, narratives, and reflections—adds texture, nuance, and emotional truth to those patterns.

By integrating both, we aim to create profiles that feel grounded in research and recognizable on a human level. The archetypes and language in these profiles emerge from lived experience, not from abstract theory alone.

What These Profiles Are (and Aren’t)

These profiles are relationship tools, not diagnoses or destiny statements. They are meant to:

• Help you clarify your own bonding preferences and pain points

• Offer language for discussing needs, boundaries, and desires with partners

• Normalize difference rather than rank or judge relational styles

They are not meant to box you in, predict your future, or replace conversation, consent, or care. Many people will recognize parts of themselves across multiple archetypes, or notice their results shifting across life stages, relationships, or healing processes. That flexibility is expected—and welcomed.

How to Read Your Profile

Each Bonding Project profile is structured to be both reflective and practical. As you read, you may find it helpful to:

• Notice what feels immediately accurate—and what doesn’t

• Reflect on how this archetype shows up across different relationships

• Use the language as a starting point for conversation

The most valuable insights often come not from perfect resonance, but from curiosity: Why does this part fit? Why does this part feel off? What does that tell me about what I want or need right now?

Using This as a Shared Tool

Many bonders choose to share their profiles with partners, friends, or collaborators as a way to open dialogue. When used together, these profiles can support clearer communication, reduce misinterpretation, and create more intentional agreements around intimacy, autonomy, and care.

Ultimately, The Bonding Project exists to support more honest, compassionate, and self-aware relationships—with yourself and with others.